83: Peace, Presence, and the Power of Pausing

Welcome with your host and business guru, Nakisha King.

This podcast is the ultimate destination for women creative entrepreneurs who want to break free from burnout.

If you are overwhelmed by client demands and feel like you're doing this all alone, you, my friend, are in the right place.

Now let's dive in for steps to take back your time and see simplify your workflow.

All right, Nikisha, take it away.

Hello, gorgeous.

Welcome.

Welcome back to the iconic CEO podcast, where free spirits fall in love with systems and with structures becomes a gateway to your freedom.

I am your host, Nikisha King.

I am your disruptive sales and systems coach, and it's a pleasure to have you in my world now.

I can't believe we're already wrapping up our first month inside the foundation series.

October has been so rich, not just in our conversations, but in clarity.

If you've been following along since our relaunch, you know this has been about building your business from the inside out, AKA from the ground up.

So we're all about building the foundation series where structure meets soul.

And honestly, I couldn't have chosen two more aligned guests to help us on this journey.

Karen Bartholomew and Barbara Burgess.

You've heard their episodes here, and I hope you truly enjoyed it.

Make sure to leave a comment letting us know.

So today I want you to take a moment of reflection.

What we've learned, what it means for you, and how to turn all of the awareness into aligned action.

But we don't just listen around here.

We lead differently.

When Karen joined, she introduced us to something deceptively simple, yet radically freeing.

The pause method.

Karen says stillness is a radical leadership tool.

Oh, my gosh, you so right.

And I want you to sit with that just a little bit.

In our culture, we celebrate hustle, energy, and she's asking us to celebrate being intentionality, to understand that leadership doesn't always look like more doing, but it looks like intentional pauses, moments where we can just be in her words, so vividly.

When a woman learns to pause, she becomes dangerous in the best way because she's no longer leading from reacting, but she's leading from clarity.

That line stayed with me all month because as CEOs, as mothers, as partners, as creatives, we are constantly responding.

Email, client work, staff, teams, deadlines, families.

Reaction can become the rhythm, our rhythm.

But leadership begins in the piece before the response, you know, right there, that still moment, that's where leadership begins.

So what I want to do is I want to take some time and translate some actionable ways to create the pause method or micro Pauses.

So a micro pause is a 90 seconds of stillness in the middle of chaos, in the middle of indecision.

That's what this is.

It's like walking to the mailbox, like Karen did when she was a single mom of three.

Oh, my God, I had so many of those moments.

I needed them.

And putting the phone down before you reply to that message, when with that tone, it's taking one deep breath and then clicking send.

Because when you insert a pause, you insert power.

The power of response.

With intention instead of impulse.

So this week, I want you to try that.

Every time you feel pulled into hustle mode, whisper to yourself, pause and choose.

That one choice changes everything.

Does for me.

Thanks, Karen, for that.

Then came our conversation with Barbara, the author of Enough Finding Peace in a world of Distractions, Hustle and Expectations.

Barbara reminded us that peace is not the reward, it is the actual resource.

She said something that resonated deeply with me.

I stopped waiting for milestones to give me peace.

I chose peace first, and the milestones followed.

Ah, these amazing guests.

If you've ever chased a goal, thinking you'll rest, then you'll reframe.

Barbara invited us to experience peace now, not later, but right now.

You can, even though it doesn't feel like you can, try it.

To build from fullness, not from depletion.

To let enough sit on your lap, our lap, as we create, rather than waiting until we earn it.

Earn it.

You cannot earn peace.

But you are peace, my love.

Now this leads us to the second action.

Redefine productivity as presence.

Here's what that means in practical terms.

Instead of asking, what did I finish today?

Ask how present was I?

What in what I finished?

You heard me.

Let me say that again.

Because I messed up.

Because I'm imperfect.

How present was was I in what I finished?

Replace multitasking with meaning.

Tasking one task, full heart, no guilt.

It's something I practice every day when I show up to do certain things for myself, for my business, for my clients, my family.

And allow rest to count as strategy, not as slacking.

My love, you're not slacking.

You're taking a pause moment so you could be intentional and play at your highest ability.

Because peace isn't passive.

Peace is a powerful operating system, is the quiet confidence that lets you build without breaking, without burnout.

Barbara also said something I want every woman listening to tattoo on their business plan.

You heard that?

Tattoo it.

Keep it there permanently.

You were never meant to hustle your way into worth.

You were born with it.

I'm Going to repeat that again.

You were never meant to hustle your way into worth.

You were born with it.

You already have it, my love.

You're not looking for it, so you don't need to earn rest.

You simply need to receive it and be open to it.

One theme that wove through both conversations was boundaries without walls.

Space.

Not the kind that you build walls.

That's why I took the walls out, but the kind that build wellness.

Barbara talks about the power of small nosy.

Not the dramatic ones, not the ones we post on social media, but the everyday decisions that reclaim your energy.

The invitation you decline because your soul says no.

The email you respond to tomorrow instead of tonight.

The event you skip because quiet feels more nourishing than conversation.

And Cameron reminded us that authenticity is saying yes from wholeness.

Wholeness, not obligation.

That we don't need to shape shift to be palatable.

We just need to stay rooted in our truth.

The truth of who God or the universe designed you and me to be.

Got it?

All right, let's go to action 3.

Practice the small no.

This is where I'm going to add the adjectives more and make it okay.

So this week, say no without a because.

Just say no.

I'm unavailable.

Not no.

I'm unavailable because I'm doing this.

Just no, thank you.

Have an amazing time.

That's it.

Nothing more, nothing less.

It's okay to say a small no.

You and I don't owe any explanations for protecting our peace.

If you want to, you can, but don't feel like you have to.

Boundaries are not barriers.

They are bridges.

At times, depending on how you use it, between who you were and who you're becoming.

That's the bridge.

When you protect your peace, you preserve your purpose.

And when your purpose is preserved, your business flourishes with clarity.

Yes, clarity and confidence.

If you listen to both of these episodes, Karen's on the pause method and Barbara on enough.

And if you didn't go back two episodes, you'll find them.

You probably notice a beautiful harmony between them.

Karen teaches us to pause.

Barbara teaches us to rest in enough.

And together they reach us to lead from a middle ground, the space where our feminine low meets our masculine structure.

This is who I am.

I love the beautiful harmony of feminine and masculine energy.

That, my friend, is harmony.

Not balanced.

Not 50 50, but rhythm, which is what you are capable of creating in the same energy.

I want to bring into your business systems.

Because systems are not spreadsheets.

They're your sacred rhythm of repeatability.

They are the structure that let you pause and prosper.

Remember that systems are not here to keep you enclosed, but they're here to make you prosper in ways you didn't think were possible.

Now, I'm going to take a moment of reflection.

I want you to take a deep breath right here, right now.

Pause for a minute.

I want you to think about October as your mirror month.

The month where you looked at how you were building in acts.

Is this aligned with the woman I'm becoming?

Because your business will never outgrow your capacity for peace.

You can have the perfect funnel, the best automation, the dream client list.

But you're in a world if it's in chaos.

Your systems will only multiply that chaos.

Yes, it will.

So, as we close this month, I want you to recommit to the real work, the inner structure that sustains the outer success.

Now, let's make it simple.

Here's the iconic action triple play for October.

1.

Pause with presence.

Micro pause before you respond.

Decide or plan.

Let awareness lead you in your response.

Pursue peace on purpose.

Not by accident, but on purpose.

Schedule your stillness.

Like you schedule meetings.

Protect it.

Keep it sacred.

That one hit me hard.

I'm really good at doing meetings.

And in between those meetings, I have a pause moment.

A decompressed moment.

3.

Practice the power of no.

Say no with your peace whispers louder than the people you're pleasing.

Say no without having a reason to say no.

These are the habits that will free you faster than any new software ever could.

I want you to take a moment to thank my incredible guest this month.

Karen, for reminding us that stillness is a superpower.

And Barbara, for showing us that enough is not a limitation, it's a liberation.

Heard that.

Love that one.

Your voice helped anchor this new season in exactly the energy we needed, grounded, intentional and human.

And to you, my beautiful, gorgeous listener, AKA Mientes, thank you.

Thank you for being here, for growing with me, and for letting me see speak into your evolution.

Because when you tune in, you're not just listening to a podcast.

You're practicing presence in the moment.

You're building a business that breeds.

Now, what to expect for November.

We're stepping into the identity shift from doer to designer of your business.

If October was about peace and pause, November will be about power and perspective.

We're going to talk about who you are becoming as you let structure support you, not suffocate you.

So make sure you subscribed.

And if these episodes spoke to your soul, share them with another creative CEO.

Include someone else on this journey who needs a gentle reminder that rest and revenue can coexist.

And if this episode sparkled or sparked reflection, it's time to move forward from awareness to implementation.

So what I'm going to do is I'm going to ask you to join my free workshop.

Go from ghosted to book.

Learn the exact shifts to turn silence into sales.

You're going to find a link in the Show Note.

It is accessible to you at any time.

You can literally open it, watch it, and take all of its jewels with you.

And if you're looking to connect with me, I would love to connect with you.

Definitely come and DM me on my Instagram page at nkbiz B I Z Guru G U R U or just email us at hello.

Like business essentials, period.

Nikisha king.com all in the show Notes.

And last but not least, subscribe to Iconic CEO Podcast for more conversations that will help you scale with clarity, confidence and purpose.

And until next time, remember, this structure doesn't take your freedom away.

It is what gives you freedom back.

Lead softly.

Build boldly.

Build that daggone empire and and always, always choose peace first.

I'll see you in November, my love.

Thank you for joining us today.

We loved having you with us.

Remember, each action you take, no matter how small, adds up to big results.

If today's episode fired you up, hit subscribe for more insights and visit our Resource hub, which is linked in the Show Notes.

There you'll find tools to streamline, organize and grow your business.

Keep moving forward and we'll be right here to cheer you on next week.